Rebekah Agnes' Birth Story

Our fourth child arrived on November 5, 2013. Her name is Rebekah Agnes, and she weighed 11 lbs, 1oz (Smaller than our last baby!) and 20.5 inches and was born at 9:24am.

The details- I went in that morning for a planned c-section. After 3 previous attempts at a vaginal birth, and all ending in a c-section, this one was going to have to be a c-section. It was much different this time, knowing when she'd be born, knowing the c/s was going to happen, etc. I pictured it'd be quick and easy. Go in, have c/s, in an hour or two, we'd be in my room, having skin to skin and nursing and resting. When we arrived, we found out they'd had an unplanned c/s, and we had to wait around until they got the OR cleaned.

38 weeks, 1 day

Finally, a little before 9am, they had me walk to the OR. I was very nervous waiting for the anesthesia, but managed it well enough. It was very odd being awake and aware during the c/s (In my previous 3 csections, I'd been put under, I'd had the anesthesia go to high so was more focused on trying to breath, and was so tired from laboring for 28 hrs that I slept through almost the whole c/s) As soon as I laid down, I threw up some medicine they had given me. They said that was very common.

Thankfully I wasn't paying much attention to what they were doing to me. I was just anxious to hear her cry, to know they had gotten to her. Jon told me it took about 10 minutes to get in usually, but I never knew that. That was the longest 10 minutes of my life haha! Finally, I heard her. It was an overwhelming sound, but she sounded like she was gagging while crying, like she had fluid or something. Jon kept telling me she was fine, but I was skeptical. Eventually, they told me her weight, which we were a bit surprised by, as my doc had guessed she'd only be about 10.5 lbs, not 11lb 1oz. Then they said they were going to have to take her to the NICU. I was NOT expecting that. Come to find out, on her way out, she had swallowed amniotic fluid and needed oxygen. They quickly showed her to me, then took her to NICU. I began to cry and of course, wasn't able to hide it. Jon went with her.

They took me back to L&D to recover. Normally it's about 2 hrs there to recover before going to mom/baby. However, mom/baby was crowded and they were discharging people, so they told me to hang out in L&D for a while. That ended up being a good thing because i was throwing up everything they gave me. They gave me zofran twice, which didn't help. At one point, I went to go see her. I saw her for a short bit, and touched her through the incubator- they wouldn't let us hold her or nurse her because she had been so stressed out from the IVs, as they had to stick her 5 times or more. Very soon after arriving, I told Jon we needed to leave. No sooner did we get out of the NICU and I threw up again. Eventually they gave me a shot that worked instantly. After that, I was finally able to go see Beka and spend some time holding her.

The first time we went in, she was doing better on the oxygen and they felt she'd be able to come off soon. They were waiting until the next day to try to give her any food because they didn't want to stress her body out any more. They were having problems with her IV, getting it to stay. At some point, she had one slightly low blood sugar, so was getting dextrose via IV. (I was shocked because I had amazing control in this pregnancy, and none of my other kids ever had sugar issues.) At 10pm, we were heading to NICU when we were told to wait b/c they were having to do another IV and they were giving her formula so the IV wouldnt be an issue. I started crying, as I wanted to nurse her, no one asked me about formula, and they said they were going to wait until the next day to give it to her.

It was advised that I pump over night, and anything I pumped, I could ask my nurse to take to NICU. So I pumped every 2-3 hrs, and did get some colostrum sent down to her. We went back to visit her at 8am. We spent almost the whole day in the NICU, so it's really all a blur, but at some point, they allowed us to basically do SNS with her, put a tube in to her mouth to get the formula, while she also nursed on me, helping my milk to come in and getting her colostrum. At 7pm, after having to force more formula on her (Which she usually threw up), she was finally able to be discharged. I was frustrated during the day because they kept checking her sugars, said they were great, but were forcing her to continue to take formula to keep them up. Everything i'd heard was that if blood sugars are an issue in a baby, they regulate themselves within 24 hrs, but they wouldn't cut out the formula to see if her sugars were stable without it. My motherly instinct told me she likely was stable.

When she finally got discharged from NICU, they told us she may need to supplement with formula still until my milk came in. Yet, they never checked her blood sugar again after discharging her from NICU. We never supplemented. And she never appeared to need formula. About the 2nd time she tried to nurse after being in my room, we heard her swallowing several times and realized "Wow! My milk must be in already!"

After that, the rest was a blur. I nursed, started to be in more pain, and the next morning, Jon went to pick up the kids from our friends. Right after they arrived and met her, we were discharged to go home. Unlike any other hospital i've been to, they allow you to just walk out without a wheelchair. Oh, BAD idea. I didn't realize how long of a 'short' walk it'd be to the car, and was in a lot of pain by the time i got to the car.

Meeting her for the first time.

Sisters!

Daddy watching a movie with all 4 kiddos.

Recovery this time was much more challenging than in the past. I had a lot more pain, and had to take stronger pain meds than ever before. It also lasted longer, a full week. Now, Rebekah is 3 weeks old, and I'm feeling great. We started back to homeschooling this week from "maternity leave" and we're slowly getting back in to a routine. We've been so blessed by friends who have been so supportive, with watching the other three, providing meals, coming to Beka's baptism, and just wishing us well and praying for us. God is so good and we have been so blessed.

Last week, when she was two weeks old, Rebekah was baptized. We were very blessed because Jon's brother, Fr. Nathan, was able to fly in and do her baptism. It made it even more special for us. We were also very blessed because we picked our very close friends here to be her Godparents, so it was wonderful having her Godparents be present as well. We are slowly settling in to this family of six thing, and enjoying every minute of it.

 Zach got to serve mass with Father at all his masses. He felt so grown up and proud.

Kids pondering the Holy Family

Today during lunch, my older two were admiring a Holy Family scene that was on the table. The conversation went something like this:

Zach: Mommy, Mary used her scarf to wrap Jesus up. Why?

Me: Well, he was probably cold....

Zach: Mommy, why don't they have any children?

Me: They do! They have Jesus!

Zach: No, they need two more kids. They need 3 kids!

Me: Oh? They do?

Zach: Yeah! They do. They need 3 just like us. Two more girls.

Me: Well, next time you pray to Jesus, let him know.

Zach: Mommy, why don't they take Jesus to Church?

Me: They do.

Zach: But I've never seen him. (He's thinking BABY Jesus, as opposed to Jesus on the cross)

Me: Well... ::thinking:: Well, Jesus isn't alive anymore, to where we can see him. He's in heaven. But he's in church. Remember on the cross?

A few moments later. Zach: But? Jesus became God?

Me: Well, kind of. He's the same person. Like you call Daddy "Dad, Daddy, Father, and I call him Jon", well, Jesus and God are the same.

Zach... no more words, just quietness. After about 2 minutes, I notice it's completely quiet from the two kids. I asked them why they're being so quiet.
Zach: Because, it's nice. Let's all be quiet. No talking.

Hannah: Yeah, because Abby is asleep.

Wow! For a four year old, this kid threw me some tough Spiritual questions today! I love seeing his mind work, but man, I'm not quick enough on my feet!! Looking back, I could have said things better, but oh well. I have years to continue to form him. It's also hard to try to give an answer on a 4 year old level.

Kid funnies

With one child just 4 months shy of being four, and one child just over two and a half, i hear some pretty funny things. If you follow me on Facebook, you may have read some. And I have to warn you that some of them may be slightly TMI, but out of the mouths of babes makes everything funny.

Hannah brought me some (pretend) breakfast. "Here's your breakfast mommy! Abby chewed it up for you" Oh... nice

I was using the bathroom at home and my son hands me the box of tampons and says “Here mommy, these are for your poop.”

Zach-Mom! I almost fell in the toilet! That would be bad... because then we can't have another kid.
Me- WHAT?? Why?
Zach- because you'd flush me down the toilet! ( In other words, we'd be MINUS one kid. Him falling in has nothing to do if we can have ANOTHER one. I was trying to understand how he knew about more kids)

Hannah was wailing. I went in and she's holding herself down there. I asked what was wrong and she said she hurt her butt. I asked her how and she said "I bounced" I had to stifle a laugh as I wondered how she ‘bounced’.
I said “You bounced?”
Yes, i bounced.
Come to find out, she JUMPED/Bounced off her bed and hurt herself.

My son had had a sore penis recently. A few nights later, my 2.5yo daughter is in the bathtub grabbing herself and in a pretend whine, saying “My pinky hurts mommy”.

Me: DO you have to go potty?
son- no
M- then stop playing with yourself
son- no, I'm trying to get my candy! It's in my pocket.
Sure enough, he had an unwrapped tootsie roll in his pants, right next to his boy parts!

We were praying the Our Father and Zach was saying it with me. We say "And lead us not into temptation" and he stops me to say "Mommy, I don’t know what that is."
I ask “What? Temptation?”
Him- Yes...
"Well, it's when someone tries to get you to do something you shouldn't, like when Hannah tries to get you out of bed."
son-but why?
Because they're trying to get you in trouble"
his reply? “Ok.” And we finished prayers.

Very similar to the fact that now at meal prayers, I get requests for which prayers we’ll say. If it’s Our Father, or God Our Father or Now I lay Me Down to sleep or just “Thank you Jesus for this food.”

You can learn a lot about your parenting skills and those around you by listening to your children. Hannah likes to tell her brother and her bear “I’m going to spank your hiney, you hear me? Stop talking. Sit still. I’m going to put you in the corner if you don’t behave bear. No you can't watch TV” (I tried to figure out where hiney comes from then discovered my dad says it) She definitely feels like she's in charge. I'm nervous about what will happen as Abby gets older

I know there have been more stories and humor in my life lately, but right now, these are the ones I'm still laughing about.

Temptation

My brother-in-law (husband's brother) will soon be ordained into the priesthood. He's been writing daily little emails (Also readable on his blog). The one Br. Nathan wrote yesterday really spoke to me, as he said:

It’s at times like these, especially when you are working alone,....that temptations increase. Have you ever experienced that yourself? When the devil uses your difficult moments and tries to pry into your thoughts with temptations of division, envy, negative judgments or plain old self-love? “How come it’s always me? Don’t they realize? This isn’t as easy as it seems?” etc. etc.

I hadn't thought about it like this, but I feel exactly like he said. That Satan has used my difficult moments of doing so much alone lately, to tempt me, to make me mad, anxious, jealous, and all kinds of other sins. Sins I hadn't even realized I was doing because I was so deep in to them, and so deep in doing all the work alone. And yes, self-love. I try to be humble about most of it, but I am one who needs words of affirmation, and therefore self-love definitely sneaks in.

Last night, as we were saying bedtime prayers, my son, three and a half, was actually reciting the Our Father with me (pretty rare). We said "And lead us not in to temptation..." and he stops me. He says "But Mommy, I dont know what that is."

"What? Temptation?"

"Yeah"

I try to explain to him that it's when someone tries to get him to do something he's not suppose to. Like when his sister tells him to get out of bed when he's suppose to be in bed.

He looks at me, and says "But why?" (We're going through this "why" phase)

I said "Because they're trying to get you in trouble."

He says "Ok" and we continue our prayers. You could tell the rest of the prayers, he was still thinking about this big word, TEMPTATION.

I think I will be thinking a lot about temptation in the coming days, and the words of the Our Father will resonate in a new kind of way for me. I have just over a month of doing it on my own. Lord, please lead me not in to temptation, but rather help me stay clear from it.

Kids create good laughs

There are several stories lately that I just have to share...

Hannah was eating a cheeseburger for lunch. I told her to put it in her mouth. Her reply "No, nose" and proceeded to shove it up her nose. We couldnt stop laughing. Then she also took the wrapper and put it on her head and said "hat".

At dinner, Zach wasn't eating. He started making silly noises, while pretending to put it in his mouth. His Uncle Drew started making train noises and told him to put the train in his mouth. Zach puts his hand up in a "stop" kind of way, and said "You no choo choo".

We were sitting on the couch, mom, me, Zach (while holding his stuffed dogs) and my brother's girlfriend. My dad yelled soemthing to their dog. Then Zach said "The dog pissed me off yesterday" We were trying not to laugh, not sure if that's what he said. So I said "What" and he said "The dog pooped on the floor in my room....(followed by) I cleaned it up with diaper wipes" (When the dog poops in the house, it gets cleaned up w/ Clorox wipes...)

Zach was in his carseat with the stuffed dog by his face, when I heard him say "Doggy getting the boogers"

Hannah came up to Abby and said "Aww honey, it's ok." The girls took a bath together and Hannah helped me wash Abby.

In the middle of a word, in the middle of a sentence, Hannah lets out a loud belch, and just continues to talk like nothing happened.

You can be great at nursing discreetly, but when your daughter gulps while it's completely silent in mass, it's not so discreet.

slow updating here

I'm slow updating around here. Life has been VERY busy and hectic. First of all, we're having a girl! Her name will be Abigayle Claire, gayle after my mom and sister's middle name. After picking Her name, we found out Jon's grandfather is RIchard Clare and my grandfather was Richard Gail, so it honers both of our grandfathers as well, instead of using Richard. :)

They are concerned about her having pyloric stenosis, and will do another ultrasound on May 12 to determine it. If she does,it will mean a surgery after shes born, but should be relatively easy and simple. I'm very worried and nervous and usually cry when i think about it, but everyone who's had experience with this tells me there's nothing to worry about really. It's actually a great thing that it can be diagnosed now, rather than dealing with months of awful puking.

Our life is moving so fast right now. We are moving in about a month, which is much earlier than planned. It all works out much better this way, but it creates a lot of stress. I feel like I've been super woman lately, totally not by choice, but because I absolutely have to. We're having a garage sale next weekend, and we are literally selling about 1/2 of our stuff. Decluttering has never felt so wonderful and freeing!

My kids have been hilarious lately. For example, Hannah got in bed this morning with me. I asked her if I could have a hug and kiss and she said "No, Abby", pulled up my shirt, and gave my belly a hug and kiss. Some of Zach's new ones are I was changing his diaper in the back of the Suburban 2 days ago, and he said "Mommy, penis outside." yes son, it is lol!...He also made me lay down on his lap recently and told me night night, while he combed and "cut" my hair... Another "What's your name?".."Zachary A...M..." What's mommy's name?"..."Mommy A...M..." Lol..ok, that works, I have the same middle and last name as my son. ... The final one is one night, we were sitting down for dinner, when Jon realized he forgot to kiss me when he walekd in. So he got up and gave me a kiss. Zach asked what he was doing and I said "Daddy's kissing me because he loves me." Zach looks at me, gives me a huge smile and says "I love you babe!"

saw the baby

We hired a sitter last Monday, for the first time ever, so Jon and I could go to the doc appointment alone. Thankfully, there was one, good, happy looking baby. I was so thankful Jon went with me, because as we left, we discovered we were driving on the rim thanks to a nice nail. I never would have been able to change the tire on my own, so I'm very thankful he was there. I also learned that my progesterone levels were even better and I got to go down to one shot twice a week, and my reaction to them seems to be much better lately, so that's good.

Aside from this, if you are open to praying for me, I could use prayers lately. I'm going through a very difficult time spiritually. Things I dont feel comfortable discussing, but things that I really need to work out, stuff that's going to take time. I need lots of healing and obviously, can't do it on my own.

The kids are doing great. H has discovered jewelry and some new red heart Valentines sunglasses. She's become somewhat of a little diva. It's really cute lol! She is also insisting a lot on wearing her squeaky shoes, and then loves to dance and make noises with them.

Z is growing up fast. He's quickly learning that he's not suppose to get out a new bucket of toys until his other toys are put away, and he's started telling H what to do. ie today, we were telling her to get off the picnic table. He said "H, get down, now." LOL! He's also really big in to praying. When we eat, we say the basic meal prayer, and at the end, we taught him to say "Thank you Jesus for this food, Amen." and he's totally started saying it on his own without us prompting him. Also, H has started putting both of her hands on her head when we do the sign of the cross. I love the innocence and learning of little children.

Anyway, that's it for tonight.

babies and "cwap cwap"

Last week was super busy, several doc appointments, two moms Nights Out, and Mops, and Bible study. I was so exhausted. Saturday we spent almost all day at our friends house. Jon helped change their brakes and messed up his finger pretty bad. I hung out with the kids and Bobbie all day, and we baked and had lots of fun.

I'm having a really hard time. I'm not sure if it's the progesterone I'm on (I'm taking 2,200mg in a week!), or that mixed with pregnancy and everything else going on, but I'm feeling really depressed. I've never felt depressed before, except for like 2 days with PMS. This is so bad, that even Jon thinks so. If I ever get in to see the OB, I plan on talking to them about it. Today is the first day I've been able to really get anything done in my house, without feeling mopey and not wanting to do anything. But yeah, Jon says that I'm complaining about everything and so pessimistic, which is NOT like me.

The kids are good. Hannah is saying so much, talking more than most kids her age. She loves her babies and if she's doing something she's not suppose to, it's easy to distract her by saying "Where's your baby?" She also loves to pull her shirt up and say "tickle tickle tickle" or come up to me or zach and do the same. She also says daddy all.day.long. It's her favorite word haha.

Zach is all about reading lately. He brings me books and says "close it" and tries to close my laptop lol. I decided to try to do http://letteroftheweek.com/ with Zach, but I didn't get very far. But, we've been learning about cows. A cute cow book if you're interested is Click Clack Moo by Doreen Cronin. He knows what noise cows make. And ducks say "cwap, cwap" lol. he also knows sheep say "baaa, baa" and he shakes his head while he says it lol. We've also been working on horses, birds, and a few other ones.