And now

We have basically decided that I will go home and live with my parents during Jon's time away, for many reasons. The support of family is very important. Also, we are pretty certain we will be going overseas after his deployment, so I feel it's important for my kids to spend as much time with their extended family as possible before we go. Also, Jon is worried about me living alone with my diabetes, which I can understand.

So now, we have about 7 months to figure everything out and pack, etc. My mind is constantly racing. "Do I want to keep this or put it in the yard sale?" "Will we really use this in Europe? Can I replace it if I decide I want something like it? Does Europe have Goodwill type stores? I mean, that's where the majority of our belongings and the kids' clothes come from after all. Should I put this in storage or take it to FL with me? Is this worth hanging on to until we have another baby, or should i just get rid of it and replace it down the road? All of these questions and I can't stop thinking about moving. However, I also really want to enjoy the remainder of our time here, so I am trying not to think about it too much.

In other news, I am so ready for Christmas! I can't wait to see the kids open their Christmas gifts this year. I can't wait to get the big box of stuff from Santa out of my room. :) I am completely ready, with the exception of wrapping about 5 more gifts. However, that requires cleaning our awful bedroom so I can find the rest of the gifts haha. That's my plan for the afternoon. In fact, it's 12, so I'm going to go put lil man in bed, put dinner in the crockpot, and start my bedroom and cleaning my bathroom.

Today's good deal. I found a Little Tykes bookcase, like we had growing up, in pink, for $6 at the Goodwill today! Super excited about it, as I think they are now collectors items. It looks like the one below.

How God works

I have shared with a handful of people our sad news. Today, Jon found out he has orders to the Middle East. It's a safe place he's been to many times before, but it's away from us, for a year. He leaves in July. This was a total bombshell to us. We were expecting at least one more year here. During that one more year, we had big plans. Jon was going to apply to Officer Training School, we were going to try to get pregnant again, we were going to go to Rome a year from now for his brother's ordination, we were going to go here and there, etc. Now, none of that will happen. But, it's really amazing how God works...

Jon was going to apply for OTS in December, but the board got canceled. That took some stress off of us, but now we see, it worked out that Jon hasn't been busting his butt to apply, only to find out we couldn't apply. We experienced a miscarriage 2 months ago. We've been waiting on some doctors stuff before we decided to try again. We were planning to in January. Now we're really thankful we had decided to wait until January. We had felt recently like we weren't suppose to go to Rome, even though we really wanted to go. It just didn't feel right for some reason. Now, we know why.

It's amazing to see, when I get out of my "pity-party,- you-stink-Air-Force, you're-messing-up -our-plans" mood, to see how God is and has been working it all out for us. I'm still so NOT happy about it. In fact, I seriously have had crying moments on and off all day, especially when Jon came home and started crying because he's going to miss a year of the kids' lives. Plus, when I'm crying and my 2 year old says "Crying mommy, crying", that doesn't help either.

But, we know this, that God will supply all our needs. We have so much to be thankful for. We're thankful that God let us be stationed here in the beginning of our marriage, so that we could really cultivate our marriage without a deployment for the first 3 and a half years of marriage. We're thankful that God blessed us with two beautiful children during that time. We're thankful that if the kids and I stay here, or if we go back home to FL, we have a support system either way. We're thankful that during Jon's time there, we'll be able to become almost completely debt free. We're thankful that afterwards, we might be able to get orders to Germany and travel throughout Europe during that time.

Now... if I can try and remember all the reasons I'm thankful, and think about the positive instead of the negative, I'd be doing good.

List a Mile long

Of course, it's the holidays. So what does that mean? Lists and lists of things to do. I can't even tell you everything I need to do, and I'm done shopping! Christmas cards, baking, wrapping, mailing packages, finishing both of the wreaths that needed to be redone, clean the house, etc. We have company coming in town on Friday, so it's one of those "I have 5 days to do everything". And this doesn't include the normal stuff, like playgroup's cleaning toys tomorrow night, doc appointment tomorrow, Bible Study on Tues., taking meals to two new mommys on Tues and Wed., playgroup on Wednesday, playdate at my house on Thursday, Holy Day of Obligation on Tuesday, etc. etc. etc. Then I just got an invite to a party on Thurs night. I thankfully am denying the invitation.

Yet, I'm realizing that even though I have this huge list of things to do, I need to stop now and then. I need to read a book or play on the floor with the kids a little. I need to relax and watch a show with Jon. I need to take the time to enjoy the holidays. I am soooo excited about Christmas for the first time in years. I absolutely cannot wait to see my kids and the excitement they get from Christmas this year.

Anyway, I guess my point is, to you, and to myself most importantly, is don't get so overwhelmed by all the "things" this Christmas. remember what it's really about... Jesus' birth, giving, family, spending time together, etc.

Aside from this, last Sat., Hannah just up and decided she wanted to walk, and now she is, all over the house. I LOVE it! It's that wobbly but determined stage. She's following Zach all around wherever he walks. So cute!